Reality-Based ... and Not

Trying to have a reality-based conversation with somebody who gets their ‘facts’ from Faux News, is like trying to get a 700 Club member to take real medicine, and stop sending money to their witch doctor.   

Prospectus

Fractional Legislator Ownership™

It’s long been recognized that one of the most profitable investments a plutocrat or industrialist can make is in the promising Congressional sector.  When you run the numbers the results are conclusive; with up to a ten-fold return in the first year, those who aren't investing in the legislative branch are missing out. 

But since the Citizens United ruling opened the government more fully to market forces, we've witnessed a significant uptick in the investment required to participate in this sector.  The level of investment that used to easily obtain the services of a senior Senator, now may not even be enough for a freshman Representative.  While this affects even established, more well-heeled players, it may present a serious barrier to entry for new investors.  Many of the best Senators and Representatives are already locked up, and the rapidly increasing costs of those who are available can adversely affect cash-flow. 

So how does a small to medium tier tycoon access the long-term benefits available in this sector, without the short-term hit to liquidity?

This is a problem that lends itself to a creative solution; one which I’d like to share with you.  Taking a cue from luxury aircraft industry players such as NetJets and Airshares Elite, I have founded FLO (LLC), where we architect and broker Fractional Legislator Ownership™ opportunities. 

Advantages of FLO

FLO enables our investors to enjoy many of the same benefits, and the same prestige of owning your own Senator, with a relatively more modest upfront investment.  Some investors—particularly those in highly controversial industries, or those needing specific language inserted into the tax code—may still need to fully own a Senator or House committee chair; perhaps even a Supreme Court justice.  But for all but the largest oligarchs, a strategically-designed FLO should be more than enough to meet any conceivable need. 

Profile Match

Our innovative investor-matching program employs an algorithm that matches your profile with that of other investors; identifying compatibilities and uncovering synergies, so that the combined investments of the fractional owners most effectively direct the activities of your Congressional Representative or Senator.  

Risk Reduction

Another advantage to Fractional Legislator Ownership™ is risk reduction.  As Simon Cameron once famously said, “an honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought”.  At FLO, we carefully screen our Representatives and Senators to assure that they are sensitive to the needs of our investors.  But we know that they’re human, and thus, imperfect.  If they fail to meet expectations—whether in committee work or in full session—our systems detect it, and take immediate action.  We will redirect your legislation to other key Senators or Representatives in our portfolio.  And we handle the discipline of the one who missed his or her cue – minimizing the likelihood of a recurrence.  In all cases, your investment is assured.  

Timely Opportunity

With the new Congress being seated soon—particularly the wholesale changes in leadership in the Senate—unprecedented opportunities are available to the proactive investor.  Have your people call to discuss these with one of our FLO Legislative Account Executives.  Better yet, drop by one of our offices in person. We'll open a chilled bottle of Dom Perignon, and thoroughly review our prospectus in person.  

We look forward to a mutually beneficial collaboration.  

Opera and Science

It’s fine to not be into opera.  Much of it is sung in foreign languages, using allusions and symbolism that only makes sense to people who have studied it, and are really interested in it.  I respect opera, but am not interested enough to invest the time and effort into learning it. 

It’s okay to not really be into science.  A thorough understanding of science is not easy.  Fully understanding even a narrow field of scientific knowledge requires years of directed effort and focused intellect.  Much of it is not intuitive, and sometimes runs counter to common sense.  And because frontiers of science push back against superstition and folk beliefs, many people ignore or reject science in favor of the comfort and safety of tradition. 

Few people who choose to ignore opera would then get into a heated argument with an expert on the implications of a plot element or the timing of an aria in Die Fledermaus or Otello.  But for some reason, people who have never studied science—or applied the scientific method of inquiry to anything—feel free to expound with some imagined expertise in opposition to the very fundamentals of modern science. 

People have a right to their opinions; but the right to hold them does not lend them merit. 

One who has never shown expertise or aptitude for opera would not be a good candidate for leadership of the Met.  And likewise, one who is willfully ignorant of science is not a good candidate for a role in translating scientific knowledge into governmental policy. 

http://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/inhofe-an-epa-foe-likely-to-lead-senate-environment-committee/2014/11/05/d0b4221e-64f4-11e4-836c-83bc4f26eb67_story.html

More Black Friday Thoughts

I’m thinking of writing a book; sort of a sequel to Fahrenheit 451 – Ray Bradbury’s novel of a dystopian future, in which people don’t read books, have closer relationships to characters in ‘reality’ shows they watch on wall-sized televisions than to those around them, drive too fast, compulsively consume whatever products they’re told to, and listen numbly and uncomprehendingly to stories of unending foreign wars. 

This book should just about write itself. 

I think I’ll call it Black Friday.  

My approach to Black Friday is similar to the one I take with NASCAR; I have no interest in actually attending an event, or watching it start to finish; but I look forward to highlights of the carnage on the news.  

Black Friday Blessing

A BLACK FRIDAY BLESSING

May your training pay off for you,
at the mall Thanksgiving night;
May you win the empty parking space,
with no door-dings from the fight. 

May the doors bust down before you,
and the crowds be at your back.
May the items that you’re seeking,
come right to you off the rack. 

If somebody needs an elbow
don’t be bashful, let ‘er rip.
With three TVs and five of you,
don’t let this moment slip. 

The other jealous shoppers know
you’re gonna be a hero
to your little ones; but they each know
to theirs, they’ll be a zero. 

Yes, you had to shove and jostle,
but you know it wasn't wrong;
May Black Friday spirits fill you,
all the BF season long.  

- Michel-Jacques Villeneuve

Happy Against Their Will

It's impossible to make somebody happy against their will.  

Some people hold power by maintaining an attitude of displeasure or disaffection.  Attempts to cheer them up, or gain their trust threaten this power, and will be resisted.  

Unless they are willing participants, your effort is better directed elsewhere.  

Happy Holidays! Gesundheit!

I can hardly express the outrage I feel when it’s Christmas time, and somebody walks up to me, smiles, and says, ‘Happy Holidays!’  

Just who the hell do these people think they are?  It’s not ‘Holidays’, it’s ‘Christmas’, damn it!  When people ignore the Prince o’ Peace, it just makes me want to tear them limb from limb! 

While we're on the subject I get pretty peeved when people say  'Gesundheit' instead of 'God Bless you!', or 'Excuse me' instead of 'Pardon me'.  

Gotta run now.  The O’Reilly factor is starting.  He’s continuing his special report on the secular humanist agenda!  



Can we all agree that over the next month or so, if somebody offers us a pleasant greeting, we just accept it cordially - like mature grown-ups?  
On the other hand - if you sneeze, and they say 'Gesundheit!' instead of 'God Bless You!' I think you ought to tear 'em a new one.