Friday, November 28, 2014

More Black Friday Thoughts

I’m thinking of writing a book; sort of a sequel to Fahrenheit 451 – Ray Bradbury’s novel of a dystopian future, in which people don’t read books, have closer relationships to characters in ‘reality’ shows they watch on wall-sized televisions than to those around them, drive too fast, compulsively consume whatever products they’re told to, and listen numbly and uncomprehendingly to stories of unending foreign wars. 

This book should just about write itself. 


I think I’ll call it Black Friday.  


My approach to Black Friday is similar to the one I take with NASCAR; I have no interest in actually attending an event, or watching it start to finish; but I look forward to highlights of the carnage on the news.  

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Black Friday Blessing

A BLACK FRIDAY BLESSING

May your training pay off for you,
at the mall Thanksgiving night;
May you win the empty parking space,
with no door-dings from the fight. 

May the doors bust down before you,
and the crowds be at your back.
May the items that you’re seeking,
come right to you off the rack. 

If somebody needs an elbow
don’t be bashful, let ‘er rip.
With three TVs and five of you,
don’t let this moment slip. 

The other jealous shoppers know
you’re gonna be a hero
to your little ones; but they each know
to theirs, they’ll be a zero. 

Yes, you had to shove and jostle,
but you know it wasn't wrong;
May Black Friday spirits fill you,
all the BF season long.  

- Michel-Jacques Villeneuve

Happy Against Their Will

It's impossible to make somebody happy against their will.  

Some people hold power by maintaining an attitude of displeasure or disaffection.  Attempts to cheer them up, or gain their trust threaten this power, and will be resisted.  

Unless they are willing participants, your effort is better directed elsewhere.  

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Happy Holidays! Gesundheit!

I can hardly express the outrage I feel when it’s Christmas time, and somebody walks up to me, smiles, and says, ‘Happy Holidays!’  

Just who the hell do these people think they are?  It’s not ‘Holidays’, it’s ‘Christmas’, damn it!  When people ignore the Prince o’ Peace, it just makes me want to tear them limb from limb! 

While we're on the subject I get pretty peeved when people say  'Gesundheit' instead of 'God Bless you!', or 'Excuse me' instead of 'Pardon me'.  

Gotta run now.  The O’Reilly factor is starting.  He’s continuing his special report on the secular humanist agenda!  



Can we all agree that over the next month or so, if somebody offers us a pleasant greeting, we just accept it cordially - like mature grown-ups?  
On the other hand - if you sneeze, and they say 'Gesundheit!' instead of 'God Bless You!' I think you ought to tear 'em a new one.  

Monday, November 10, 2014

Veterans Day

On the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month, the guns fell silent all along the western front. 

So ended the First World War – the most devastating war Europe had ever experienced; begun one hundred years ago last August, ending four bloody years later. 
It was the world’s first exposure to industrial-scale murder.  Over a billion (with a ‘b’) artillery shells were fired into the frontier of trenches that stretched across France and Belgium, from Switzerland to the North Sea.  Four million soldiers died in those trenches, and in the shell-pocked moonscape ‘no-man’s land’ hell that separated the sides. 

When it ended, there was briefly a hope that humanity had learned its lesson about militarism.  In that light, November 11 was established as a holiday to celebrate peace.  Here is the final clause in the US Congressional resolution of 1926:    

Whereas the legislatures of twenty-seven of our States have already declared November 11 to be a legal holiday: Therefore be it Resolved by the Senate (the House of Representatives concurring), that the President of the United States is requested to issue a proclamation calling upon the officials to display the flag of the United States on all Government buildings on November 11 and inviting the people of the United States to observe the day in schools and churches, or other suitable places, with appropriate ceremonies of friendly relations with all other peoples.”

It’s an international holiday.  Though it goes by different names in different countries, the prayers for peace, and the expressions of respect for those who have borne the brunt of conflict are common. 

Greetings for Veteran’s Day, Armistice Day, Remembrance Day. 


Peace!